


Taking A Chance

by Bookworm4life



Category: CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-25
Updated: 2017-04-03
Packaged: 2018-09-02 05:15:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 19,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8652382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bookworm4life/pseuds/Bookworm4life
Summary: While taking a break from a difficult case, Sara reflects on her and Grissom's relationship.





	1. Chapter 1

Late January 2007  
   
It was a case not unlike others she had worked, but Sara had difficulty fighting the frustration building in her body. She sat across the suspect as she put away the evidence collected from him. The snide comment from him wasn’t exactly unexpected, if anything it was a little cliché, but Sara still had to bite back a retort with difficulty as she stared the man down.

She knew she had to leave the room before she jeopardized the case. With a shake of her head, and an exasperated huff of annoyance, Sara pushed away from the table and left the interrogation room.  
   
Standing outside the room, Catherine witnessed the exchange and glanced at Sara from the corner of her eye as she passed by, her concern growing . She’d known that this case would be tough on Sara, especially now. Catherine felt a brief suggestion of doubt in Grissom’s steadfast faith in Sara’s ability to see this through to the end.  
   
Catherine followed after Sara, who was pacing the corridor with an air of agitation.  
   
“Take a deep breath, Sara and  _relax_ ,” Catherine suggested, her tone filled with concern as she drew closer to Sara.  
   
Sara shook her head, as she continued her anxious pacing, with her hands on her hips.  
   
“He thinks this is all a joke!” her voice rose slightly. “What he did to that family…” finally she stopped her pacing, and shook her head, this time dejectedly as unexpected tears pricked her eyes.  _No remorse. He doesn’t deserve the smug smile on his face. He doesn’t deserve anything._  
   
“And he’s going to pay for it, Sara,” Catherine soothed calmly, placing a supportive hand on Sara’s arm. “But first you need to calm down, and take a breath. It’s getting close to the end of shift. Take a walk. Maybe get some air. Let me handle this, okay?”  
   
Sara turned to face Catherine, ready to argue the point, but Catherine jumped in first before she had chance to say a word.  
   
“I told Grissom, before he left, that if I thought it was getting too much for you, I’d give you a break. And you’re going to take it.”  
   
With a sigh, Sara nodded her head as she turned back to face Catherine. Truth be told, she really didn’t have the energy to insist. Perhaps taking a step back after collection, wasn't so bad? There were others ways she could still work the investigation.  
   
She handed the evidence to Catherine, who patted Sara’s arm. “I’ll keep you updated,” she said. “And remember,  _relax_.”  
   
With another sigh, and knowing that she had to calm down, Sara headed towards the break room. Adjusting her t-shirt, she headed for the kettle, and reached for the decaf coffee Greg had brought in especially for her.   
   
As she waited for the water to heat, she turned her attention to the large bouquet of roses standing in a makeshift vase in the sink, and despite the tension she was feeling, a small smile of delight played about her lips. Grissom told her once, that he wasn’t a heart and flowers type of guy…. but he’d changed, as they both had as their relationship flourished.  
   
It had been two weeks since Grissom had left for a seminar in L.A. But his presence was there as he’d sent her a gift of some kind almost every day. They called each other twice a day, fitting it in around each other’s schedule.  
   
He found it difficult to decide whether to leave for the seminar. But Sara had encouraged him, and after further reassurance from Catherine; he had reluctantly agreed to go. Despite having encouraged his departure, she’d missed him and looked forward to his return at the end of the week.

Just as the last drop of coffee dripped into the pot, Sara served herself a healthy mug of the brew. The scent made her smile as much as the flowers did, and before retreating to the table, she went to the refrigerator to get some milk.

Satisfied with the coffee now caramel colored, she dropped her spoon in the sink, again reveling in the sight of the bouquet. She sat down at the table and felt the weight of the day subside. She took a sip of her coffee and leaned forward slightly, closing her eyes briefly, as she lost herself in the scents of both the coffee and the roses. Her body relaxed as the tension slowly eased from her body, and she allowed her mind to drift.

It wasn’t surprising where her mind wandered. It was a time she thought about a lot while spending time alone in the last few weeks. The scenery might be the same from two years ago, but the outlook was much different.

One that unexpectedly _did_ include flowers and more heart than she imagined.

* * *

  
   
_April 2005._  
   
Sara dumped the gym bag unceremoniously on the breakfast bar. She’d thought going to the gym would help to quell the feelings of annoyance at herself for believing that this time, just maybe things were going to be different.

It seemed that she was only worth a week of his time. A week, where he had shown her how things  _could_ be if only…With a heavy sigh, she ran a hand through her hair, and gave herself a mental shake. It was never going to change…  _he_ was never going to change…  
   
He’d made his feelings quite clear on the matter and she was tired of going round in circles. If any more evidence had been needed, his recent “date” with Sofia was all the proof she required.   
   
And yet... though she’d stopped actively pursuing him, her feelings for him had not changed. They ever would. As painful as it had been, she’d slowly learned to accept that they would never be anything between them. Though that still hadn’t stopped the sting of watching Grissom and Sofia grow closer.  
   
Grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge, she placed the car keys and cell phone on the breakfast bar, before heading towards her bedroom and a long hot shower.   
   
As she stepped into the bathroom, closing the door behind her, she didn’t hear the ringing cell phone.  
   
So the missed call sat unseen as Sara stepped out of the shower, flurrying about the apartment putting in laundry and making toast to eat before she tried to get some sleep.  
   
A knock at her door stopped her activity. 

When she looked through the spy hole, her heart skipped a beat to see Grissom standing on her doorstep. She debated with herself on whether she should open the door, when he knocked again, a little more insistent this time. She could think of no reason why Grissom would be at her door, unless it was work-related. 

She opened the door in time to see the look of relief briefly cross his face, before he schooled his features into a mask of indifference. He stuffed his hands into the pockets of the brown jacket he wore.

His hesitant smile of greeting had faulted slightly, as he became aware that something wasn’t quite right.  Sara was hesitant and they stood silently looking at each other, before she opened the door wider for him to enter.

Grissom closed the door behind himself, didn't venture any further into the apartment. Instead, he stood inches from teh front door, hands still in his pockets.   
   
“Are you okay?” he asked, his voice low as he watched her carefully. She was standing with her back to him, her arms folded across her chest.  
   
“I’m fine,” Sara replied quickly. It was a lie, and Grissom saw immediately through it. He tilted his head slightly and silently studied her. Before he could think up any response, she turned to face him.  
   
“Why are you here, Grissom?”  
   
He was silent for moment, as he trying to figure what had happened since her hasty exit from the lab earlier that morning. He decided on the truth.

“I tried calling your cell. I was…. concerned…when you didn’t answer," he explained.   
   
“I went to the gym,” she explained, moving over to the breakfast bar, her arms still folded across her chest.  “As you can see I’m fine.”  
   
Grissom stepped away from the door, taking his hands out of his jacket pockets,  and stepped a little closer to Sara. He was at a loss as to why she seemed distant. Unable to think of anything to say, he remained silent, opting to watch her thoughtfully   
   
The silence was unnerving to Sara, and she felt the need to fill it.

“I heard about your date with Sofia. “  
   
“It wasn’t a date, Sara,” Grissom explained quietly, a slight frown marring his features. “It was just dinner with a friend. Since when have you paid any attention to lab gossip?”  
   
Sara bristled.

“I overheard her talking to Greg about it. From the way she was talking, she was eager to repeat the experience.”

Unable to hold his gaze, she glanced away, and turned her back on him as she folded her arms.

“I hope she’s worth the risk, Grissom," she said coldly.

  _Unlike_ _me_ , she thought silently. 

   
“It was just dinner with a friend, Sara" Grissom repeated. "There was no risk involved. I don’t know why you…”  
   
“I was there, in the observation deck, when you spoke to Dr. Lurie,” Sara stated, cutting in.  
   
She regretted it as soon as she'd said it. She hadn’t meant to reveal to him that she'd overheard him talking to Dr. Lurie. Now, it had been said in the heat of the moment, and there was no taking it back.  The sudden silence was deafening.   
   
Sara turned to face Grissom, still standing by the breakfast bar, deer-caught-in-the-headlights expression upon his face. He blinked slowly, once, then a second time. Sara could almost see his mind working, as he processed what she’d said.  
   
As the silence continued to stretch between them, Sara half expected him to do what he always did - turn and flee, without a word.  
   
Instead, he held his ground, pulling his hands from his pockets and pressed his fingertips together, in a nervous gesture. He licked his dry lips and glanced at her, their eyes meeting for an instant before he looked away.  
   
He sighed as he came to the realisation that in order to fix this, he'd have to be completely open and honest with her.  knew he had to fix the situation, and to do so, he’d have to be completely open and honest with her. It was becoming clear that inroad he'd thought he'd made to their stalled relationship over the last week hadn't gotten him very far.   
   
He dug up all the courage he could muster and held her gaze as she took a deep breath.

 “What you overheard, Sara…was  _regret_ … that I couldn’t take the chance he did.”

Grissom paused, not used to speaking so openly about his feelings, especially towards her. He'd never had a problem talking to anyone else, but with Sara, his words and his actions seemed to get lost somewhere in translation. And more often that not, he’d inadvertently hurt her. And, he regretfully admitted (if only to himself) there had been times when he’d done it deliberately.  
   
Sara' surprised at his admission, waited in silence, refusing to let him off the hook liked she normally would. She sensed an important conversation coming. Wether it would end well or not remained to be seen.   
   
“Until our chat in my office, a few weeks back, I-I-I thought…”

Grissom trailed off. Unable to hold her gaze, he glanced down at his hands, fingertips still pressed nervously together, as he struggled in finding the right words. “When you came into the office and you thought… incorrectly… that you influenced Ecklie’s decision to split up the team. … Then you … you offered dinner… so simple… and there I was … complicating things with my silence…”

He glanced up to see her attention was fully on him.

“It scares the hell out of me; how you make me feel,” he said, his gaze meeting her eyes. “When I am around you, I feel like I’m 15 again, and I’m speechless. But that’s not even an apt description for me. … What I am is a man whose screwed up every relationship I’ve ever had. … Look what I’ve done to our friendship… I’m not a hearts and flowers kind of guy, Sara. I’m an old fool with not much to offer.”

Sara lips curled in a soft smirk. She had closed the gap between them as he spoke.

“You’re not old, Grissom,” she responded, reading between the lines. Not taking her eyes off him, she continued. “Just  _older_. And grey hair can be very attractive.”

She reached up to tentatively touch his greying curls. “I don’t need “hearts and flowers, Grissom. I just want you. Faults and all. Besides, there are other ways for romance.”  
   
“I still don’t know what to do about this,” he admitted quietly, gesturing between them. “I miss what we had, working together, the closeness. I’d like to get it back, hopefully more…if its not too late?”  
   
Sara shook her head, a teasing smile on her face. “I’d like that too,” she said, feeling shy. “But all this pushing and pulling is confusing. If we do this, there’s no backing off, and changing your mind. And I can’t just forget the last year or so. We do this; we take things slow…take some time to rebuild what we’ve lost.”  
   
“There won’t be. And we’ll go as slow as you want.”  
   
“Will you let me in and not shut me out?”  
   
“Yes,” he answered seriously, his tone surprising Sara with its sincerity. “Whatever it takes to prove to you, I’m serious about this…about us.”  
   
“Okay,” Sara agreed, unsuccessfully stifling a yawn.  
   
Grissom glanced at his watch, and silently berated himself, for keeping her up so long after shift.  
   
“Get some sleep, and I’ll see you tonight,” he said, as he turned towards the front door of the apartment, with Sara following him.  
   
She opened the door, and he paused then turned to face her. After a brief hesitation, he boldly pulled her into an awkward hug and kissed her hair.  
   
“Pleasant dreams, honey,” he said, before releasing her, and leaving her apartment building and heading for his car.  
   
**  
 

Sara  wasn't expecting too much from Grissom when she stepped into CSI Headquarters at the start of shift later that night. 

 

She had lain awake for hours after Grissom had left, replaying their conversation over and over in her mind, wondering if she’d somehow dreamed the whole thing up, when sleep finally had overtaken her. She'd slept fitfully for the next few hours.

The surreal feeling that had enveloped her after Grissom left lingered after she woke up. She left for work not expecting too much of anything from Grissom.  
   
She was just heading out of the locker room when the object of her thoughts leaned against the doorjamb. Grissom had his hands in his pockets and seemed to be in no particular hurry to be anywhere.  
   
“Hi,” he greeted pleasantly, his rare grin flashing across his face at the sight of her. No awkwardness as she might have expected. At least that was a start.  
   
“Hi,” she acquiesced with a slow grin of her own, as she wondered if she should pinch herself to see if she was still dreaming.  
   
Grissom was about to say something, when his cell phone rang. As Grissom straightened up, Sara just had time to catch the flash of irritation in his eyes, before he answered his phone with a curt, “Grissom!"  
   
He listened briefly to the person on the other end for a minute, before telling them to wait. He lowered the phone, and cast an apologetic look Sara’s way.  
   
“I have to take this, but I’ll catch up with you later, okay?” His tone switching from apologetic to hopeful.  
   
Caught off guard, Sara could only nod. His grin returned, and his eyes swept over her from head to toe, his eyes finally settling on her ponytail.  
   
“You look nice, by the way,” he said before bringing the phone back up to his ear and heading for his office.  
   
Sara remained where she was. _Had he just said what she’d thought he’d said?_ This time, she did pinch herself. It hurt. She’d certainly not expected Grissom to show his intentions quite so soon. She had to give him his due, she thought ruefully as a playful smile played about her lips. She’d give him 100 percent for effort.  
   
But as she neared the break room, however, her smile faltered as niggling doubts returned. Maybe he’d change his mind once more. It wouldn’t have been the first time.  
   
She tried to push her doubts aside, but those doubts seemed validated when Grissom returned to the break room some 15 minutes later with Sofia following a step behind him. 

With barely a glance in her direction, and Sofia hovering close by, Grissom handed out assignments, pairing himself with Sofia and her with Greg. 

Sara wanted to say something to Grissom, but Greg was on her heels, nearly bouncing with excitement to get going. So she turned and slowly left.  
   
Grissom watched them leave the break room together, Greg far too enthusiastic at being paired with Sara, as they argued over who would drive. The brief glance Sara had cast his way as she'd left the break room didn't go unnoticed.   
   
With barely a glance at Sofia, Grissom left the break room. “I’ll meet you at the car,” he called over his shoulder, as he headed towards his office.  
   
**  
   
As they made their way to the Denali, Sara hid her disappointment at not being paired with Grissom. Then her cell phone buzzed with a text message. It was from Grissom. Reading his text, she couldn’t help the quick smile that brightened her face. She quickly typed back a reply, before stuffing the phone back in her jeans pocket.  
   
With more of a spring in her step, Sara joined Greg to load up the back of the SUV with equipment and their kits. Her returning good humour wasn’t lost on him.  
   
“And here I was thinking I was the only guy here who could make you smile. If I was the jealous type...”  
   
Sara’s mouth turned up into a smirk. “What makes you think it was a guy?” she asked as she headed towards the drivers side and climbed in.  
   
“You’re telling me it wasn’t?” Greg questioned as he climbed in passenger’s side. “With a smile like that, it couldn’t be anyone else but a guy.”  
   
“It was just a friend,” Sara replied as she turned the key in the ignition. “A really good friend, who’ve I’ve not seen in a while,” she added before driving in silence for a few minutes.  
   
Greg mulled over her words, knowing that would be as much as Sara would be willing to divulge. If whoever this “friend” was made her smile, he wasn’t going to complain. Sara had had so little to smile about lately. He just wished it could be because of him. But he’d learned to accept his place in her life. It was no secret he’d had a crush on Sara for years, and although she didn’t feel the same away about him, a mutual friendship had grown between them. He’d rather have her in his life as a friend, than not have her in his life at all.

**  
   
After her shift, Sara went to a diner where Grissom had suggested in a text message for a rendezvous. She sat alone at a table and nervously glanced at her watch. It had only been five minutes since she’d last checked the time.

She was sure she had the right place. The diner was not one neither she nor the rest of the team had tried before, which was likely the reason why he suggested this place in the first place.  
   
With a sigh, Sara took a sip of her coffee, wondering if she’d have been better off going to the gym like she’d said to the guys when they had invited her to breakfast. Putting her cup down, she turned to look out the window, deciding that she’d wait only another five minutes before she’d leave.  
   
She felt his presence even before she looked up towards the entrance, her heart rate increased slightly, and her stomach flipped nervously. She watched him scan the almost empty diner and smiled when he finally saw her. The worried look on his face faded as he hurried to her table.  
   
“Sorry I’m late, honey,” Grissom said as he neared her table, kissing the top of her head before sitting down. “I’d have been here sooner but it took longer than I anticipated to wrap up the case. Then I had to avoid Ecklie and some meeting…” he trailed off, shaking his head slightly, as with a smile Sara shook her head.  
   
“What did Ecklie want?”  
   
“No idea, I told him I was following a lead,” Grissom replied with shrug.

The waitress returned to the table and refilled Sara’s cup and offered Grissom coffee, a menu and a promise to return in a few minutes for their breakfast orders. The couple perused their menus, sitting in a comfortable silence.

It was a silence that continued as they ate their breakfast. Until Sara took a final sip of her third cup of coffee.  
   
“Can I ask you something? And will you answer honestly?” she asked quietly.  
   
“Sure,” Grissom answered, pushing his empty plate back, and taking a sip of his coffee.  
   
“What’s all this about, Grissom? Has this anything to do with what I’ve told you about my mother? Why now?”  
   
“No, it hasn’t,” he replied the sincerity of his tone obvious. “Its something I’ve been giving a lot of thought.”

Grissom paused, still not used to being so open with her. “At times, what I think and feel, don’t always match up,” he said with a frown of concentration, as he ran with his thoughts, not sure if he was about to put his foot in it, and about to ruin everything. “It doesn’t help one bit that I find you intimidating at times,” he quietly admitted, his eyes locking with hers briefly before looking down.  
   
Sara’s mouth dropped open, stunned.

“Excuse me? How exactly, am I intimidating?”  
   
Grissom focused on his hands, clasped around his coffee cup, feeling uncomfortable, wondering how the hell he was going to get himself out of this one. Unexpectedly, words came to him.

“Some men find beauty intimidating, Sara. They feel they may not measure up to her expectations.”  
   
Following his line of thought, Sara easily recalled the occasions when he’d said she was beautiful, and it suddenly all made sense.

“And you feared rejection, is that it?” she asked, in a gentle tone as her hands naturally brushed against his.  
   
Grissom nodded, looking up again. She was smiling that smile that he knew was only for him and it gave him courage.

“Or I’ll mess up somehow. That with time you’d eventually come to realise I‘m too old for you after all…”  
   
Sara’s fingers brushed over his once more, as she waited patiently for him to look at her.

“Do you really think that would happen, Grissom?” she asked softly. He hesitated and Sara thought he wasn’t going to answer her.  
   
Reluctantly, he nodded, his eyes fixed on their now joined hands.  
   
“Well that would negate the whole point of me moving to Vegas because you asked me to stay, wouldn’t it? Or that you’ve always meant more to me, than just my boss.”

She paused, letting her words sink in. He was being honest with her; it was only fair she be the same with him.

”I’m scared too, Grissom.” She smiled at his startled look. “It runs both ways, Grissom. I haven’t the greatest track record in relationships, either. I know this is going to be complicated. But if we both put the time in, we can make it work.”  
   
“You make it sound so simple. For this to work and continue working together, we can never be seen outside of work together, or even a hint that there’s anything between us.”  
   
“Well, that will never be a problem,” Sara smirked, her eyes sparkling mischievously. “On the times we’re seen together outside of work are the times we have breakfast with the whole team. And you’ve not accepted an invite for a while. There are places out of town…”  
   
Sara stopped when Grissom shook his head a look of wonder on his face.  
   
“You’ve thought this through, haven’t you?”  
   
She graced him with a full Sidle smile, and his heart, beat that bit faster.  _God, I love this woman, so much._  
   
“Yeah, I have,” Sara, admitted, suddenly feeling very shy. “We’re professionals, and nothing much has to really change at work. We can always work out the finer details later.”  
   
They sat quietly holding hands letting the weight of their words cement in their subconscious. When the diner became busier Grissom motioned for them to leave and paid for their breakfasts.

“My treat,” he insisted.

And as he walked her to her car, he linked his arm through hers as they continued to talk.  
   
“Maybe we could do this again?” he asked as they stopped by her car, and pulled her into a hug, the awkwardness between them gone.  
   
“I’d like that, “ Sara agreed, feeling the race of his heart through the brown jacket he wore, and wondering if he could feel hers, racing just as fast through her thin jacket.  
   
He kissed the top of her head, tightening his arms around her happily, just as his cell rang.  
   
“Grissom,” he answered, without looking at the caller I.D, at the same time tightening his embrace around Sara as she attempted to move back.   
   
“The lead took longer than I thought Conrad,” Grissom continued as Sara tried not to listen in to Grissom’s one-sided conversation. “I’m just grabbing some breakfast and I’ll be back in twenty minutes.”   
   
With an exasperated sigh, Grissom ended the call. Turning his attention back to Sara he hesitated briefly before deciding to take the leap and kiss her on the cheek, as he said, “I’ll see you tonight.” He tightened his embrace, slightly, before releasing her and heading for his own car.  
   
Sara watched after him, a sudden despondency falling over her, now she was no longer in his arms. The sound of his horn brought from her musings and he waved as he drove past her as he headed back to CSI.


	2. Chapter 2

Grissom and Sara continued to spend time together outside of work. When Grissom had nervously asked her out on their first date in their blossoming relationship, Sara realized that he had taken her words to heart, taking determined steps to prove that his intentions for a more personal relationship, were genuine.

On the afternoon of a rare day off together, Grissom had taken her to the Natural History Museum, his fingers laced through hers the entire time they were there. When they paused to read the inscriptions on the exhibits he’d drawn her closer to him, his arm comfortably wrapped around her waist. Afterwards they’d headed to a local coffee shop, where they talked on a range of topics.

Their date ended with dinner at a restaurant out of town.

Their work relationship continued to improve as they worked cases together. The companionship and easiness of the past, returning almost without effort. Sometimes Sara worked alone or was paired with Greg or Sofia, but she didn’t mind. Her time with Grissom in private was all the more special because of it.

They’d had several more dates since that trip to the natural History Museum, which included trips to the Arts Museum and Red Rock Canyon. Although Sara enjoyed their time together the majority of the time, the doubts that he would change his mind and this was all too good to be true still niggled in the back of her mind.

But Grissom continued to surprise her, one night inviting her to dinner at his townhouse, even though only he had the night off.

She’d only been to his townhouse on a few occasions. When he opened the door, it was exactly as he remembered it. His walls adorned with framed specimens of butterflies and various bugs.

The delicious smell of cooking permeated the air. Her stomach grumbled hungrily in anticipation.

“Can I help with anything?” she asked, as she followed him towards the open planned kitchen, after he’d kissed her cheek in greeting.

He was wearing the blue button-down shirt she loved, because it brought out the deep blue of his eyes, and black trousers.

“Everything seems to be under control,” he said over he shoulder with a smile. “Although there’s a bottle of wine in the fridge if you want to do the honours? The glasses are in that cupboard on the left.”

As he continued to the pans simmering on the stove, Sara reached out to open the fridge. Her eye caught sight of a caterpillar magnet that held in place a photograph of the two of them. A smirk curled the edges of her mouth, and she took the photo down.

“I can’t believe you still have this,” she said, turning to look at him, her brown eyes sparkling with delight.

Grissom turned wiping his hands on a dishtowel, pleased that he’d managed to surprise her again, when he saw what she was looking at.

He stood behind her, embracing her from behind, one hand gently resting on her stomach as the other touched the faded photograph of them both, taken seven years before. They were both much younger then. He’d still had colour in his hair, the mantle of shift supervisor at CSI still two years in the future.

The Golden Gate Bridge was behind them, and he had his arm around Sara’s shoulder. Her hair had been much longer then.

“Of course I kept it,” Grissom said, his warm breath caressing Sara’s ear as he spoke. “It was our last day together at the Forensic Academy Conference.”

His voice became wistful as he continued to stare at the photo.

He was silent for a few minutes, lost in his thoughts of the conference.

_It started off so ordinary, until the Q &A on the second lecture of the day. He had not been prepared for Sara Sidle’s insightful questions or how he would feel so drawn to her. She had hung around asking more questions after the seminar. Her intelligence and quick inquisitive mind intrigued him and he’d felt an instant attraction to her and knew she’d felt it too. He surprised himself when he’d asked her for coffee. He would never forget the smile she gave when she accepted the offer. A smile he would hope would only be reserved for him. _

_They’d spent the rest of the conference together, attending various seminars and leaving the university to walk for miles through the streets of San Francisco as they chatted. It was during one of those walks when they reached Golden Gate Park, where Sara had persuaded a passer by to take their picture. Sara pulled him close, with a huge smile on her face, as he placed an arm around her shoulder._

_When he left for Las Vegas, Sara took him to the airport. As his flight was called, he’d given her both his work and personal cell phone numbers and his email address, promising to keep in touch. He’d not been surprised when she’d pressed a piece of paper into his hand. At the last second, before she pulled away he grabbed her hand and kissed her palm, his gaze held hers, a slow grin on his face as he’d shouldered his carry on, and headed towards his terminal._

_She had sent him the photo in the mail. One of the best things he could have hoped for in his mailbox. He realized then, and he realized at that moment as she stood in his arms, that, as cliché as it sounded, he truly_ had _left his heart in San Francisco … until the day she moved to Vegas._

Just the thought of that caused him to hold Sara tighter. He could have shared all those moments that swirled in his head, but instead he shared one.

“I remember you had a ponytail,” he whispered, softly.

Sara turned around in his arms to face him, a teasing smile turning the corners of her mouth upwards and a mischievously glint in her eyes.

Grissom smirked, his hand reaching up to tuck a stray stand of hair. Her body reacted to his touch, and a pleasant shiver rippled through her body. His hand still rested on her cheek, and Sara swallowed nervously, as she became aware of a shift between them, and Grissom felt it too. As though the very air was charged with their attraction.

Sara’s pulse quickened and she licked her lips nervously, as Grissom stared at her intensely. His eyes moved from hers to her mouth and back to her eyes, and she held her breath in anticipation. He dipped his head slightly to hers, as she lifted hers to meet his, when a timer buzzed, and the moment as gone.

He released her, heading to the stove and quickly turning off the nobs and the oven, before opening the door and pulling out some crusty bread.

With a sigh at the lost moment, and wondering if she should be the brave one and kiss _him_ , Sara grabbed the glasses and the bottle of wine and headed to the table, where Grissom had lit two candles.

She poured the wine, noticing that it was non-alcoholic, and set his glass down just as he brought over their plates.

“It’s vegetarian Spaghetti Bolognese,” he explained as he headed back for the basket of warm crusty beard. “It’s made with green lentils instead of meat. I did an internet search for something to make...”

Sara was taken by his thoughtfulness, and the trouble he’d gone to. She took a tentative bite and her mouth watered.

“It’s delicious!” she said, noticing he was watching her.

Grissom raised an eyebrow as he tucked into his own pasta.

“You sound surprised that I can cook,” he said raising a forkful to his mouth.

Sara’s eyes sparkled as she swallowed her bite.

 “I’m not actually,” she said, raising another forkful to her mouth. “I’m sure there’s no end to your hidden talents. Unlike me, who cooks with take out on speed dial.”

“My mother taught me,” Grissom admitted. “I could teach you, if you’d like? I’m sure I could tweak the recipes i know for a vegetarian version.”

“Thanks, but I think I’m a lost cause when it comes to improving my culinary skills.”

“Since when have you backed down from a challenge?” he wanted to know, with a quirk of his right eyebrow. “Come on, it’ll be fun,” he encouraged.

“Okay, but I warn you, it’s a disaster in the making,” Sara said, still sounding dubious, making Grissom chuckle softly.

 

Later, Grissom walked her to her car, and after an embrace that felt far too short for his liking, he kissed her on the cheek as usual. Sara had a hard time, resisting the urge to turn her head, and kiss him right on the lips.

 As she drove away, Sara sighed inwardly to herself. She realized in a way, it was perhaps her own fault. She’d said she wanted to take things slow, and he was only taking her at her word. She just hadn’t meant _this_ slow. Things were going well, and she didn’t want to spoil them, by being too forward and scaring him off.

* * *

 

 A week later Sara stepped into her apartment after a run. Sweaty and ready for a shower, she was heading to the bathroom when she heard an unexpected knock at her door, The noise startled her more than she wanted to admit. She could have blamed her racing heart on the exertion from her long run, but she knew the reason was much more complicated.

The attack on her by Adam Trent had left her far more shaken than she wanted to admit, even to her well-meaning friends. She’d thought she could outrun the panic and helplessness she had felt. But how could you out run what was inside you? The memories of what Adam has said and did to her, echoed in her mind with every step she took.

The knock came again, insistently, and Sara hesitated.

“Sara?” Grissom’s muffled voice came from the other side of the door, the concern in his voice unmistakable.

Releasing the pent up breath she’d not realized she was holding, Sara finally managed to open the door, before quickly turning from Grissom as he stepped into the apartment.

“Are you okay?” he asked, as he followed after her a step or two. “I was worried when you didn’t answer your cell.”

“You don’t need to worry about me,” Sara said too brightly, and Grissom knew it was a lie, as she headed towards the kitchen. “I just went for a run, I’m fine.”

As she reached for a glass and turned on the tap, her hand trembled and she suddenly burst into frightened tears.

Grissom was at her side in an instant, taking the glass from her and turning off the tap, at the same time embracing her tightly to him.

“It’s okay, sweetheart,” he soothed as she clung to him tightly. He rocked them both gently as his rubbed her back comfortingly. “It’s okay,” he whispered, kissing her hair, wondering why _her_ tears should make _his_ vision watery.

“It all happened so fast,” her voice muffled by his jacket as he continued to soothe her. “Even when he was locking the door, I kept expecting you, or a nurse, someone to walk past and see what was happening.”

Grissom continued to embrace her, resting his cheek against her hair.

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart. I should never have left you alone,” he whispered, tightening his arms around her a little more.

That was all he desired to do after Sara was finally out of that room. As she stood by that barred window, Grissom fought the desire to embrace her and melt into tears. Seeing her life in danger scared him beyond belief and knowing he could do nothing to help her shamed him. But now she was in his arms, and his heart ached as she sobbed against his chest.

As her tears eased, and she pulled back slightly out of Grissom’s embrace.

He swallowed nervously, his eyes searching her face as his thumb caressed her cheek, wiping away the tears that still trailed down her cheeks.She leaned into his caress slightly, her eyes closing briefly.  Her breath hitched and her lips parted slightly. Her eyes searched his face, before dropping to his mouth, then moving back to his eyes, the implication very clear.

Neither of them was certain who made the first move, as Grissom’s lips brushed hesitantly against Sara’s. His lips were warm, and soft. And after a brief hesitation, Sara returned his caress, the kiss slowly growing in confidence.

After a minute or two, they broke apart, both of them slightly breathless, their faces slightly flushed.

“Well that confirms it,” Sara said softly.

“What does?”

"I always knew we’d be a perfect fit,” she said, kissing him again, eager to feel her mouth on his again.

Grissom was more than happy to oblige, as he pulled her tighter against his body. They kissed slowly, as they worked their way to a deeper kiss, their eyes closing in pure bliss. As their tongues entwined, Sara’s hand rested on the back of his head.

The sound of Grissom’s cell broke the moment. Grissom groaned with annoyance as he drew back reluctantly, both of them breathing rapidly.

“Grissom,” he barked into the phone, barely managing to calm his ragged breathing.

Sara started to draw back from his embrace, but his free arm held her tightly in place, and when she relaxed back into his chest, his hold loosened, marginally.

“Catherine, I spoke to Sara before I sent her home and she said she was fine. Wasn’t too happy about the night off, but under the circumstances I thought it was best. She threatened to come in, if she does send her home.”

He looked pointedly at Sara as he finished his call with Catherine. This time, Sara did pull back. This was news to her.

“So, when did you plan on telling me this?” Sara frowned.

“I just did,” he said reaching for her. She resisted slightly, before relenting, and stepping in his arms again. He kissed her hair.

“Have you had breakfast?” he asked suddenly. When she shook her head against his chest, he hesitated slightly, before suggesting, “Why don’t you have a relaxing soak in the tub, and I’ll make us breakfast? It’ll help you relax, so you can sleep.”

Sara smiled against his chest, she felt truly safe for the first time in hours, in the safe cocoon of his arms. She tightened her arms around him, listening to the racing of his heart in her ear.

“Sara?” he asked wondering if he’d perhaps said the wrong thing, and she lifted her head from his chest, and pecked him lightly on the mouth.

“Sounds like a plan,” she replied with a smile, but made no effort to move out of his embrace, already feeling far too comfortable where she was. After five minutes, Sara stepped back. It was only meant to be a quick parting kiss, as she stepped back, but it quickly turned into something more, and it was ten minutes before Sara headed towards her bedroom and a relaxing soak.

After a quick breakfast of apple cinnamon pancakes and fresh orange juice, and making quick work of the dishes, weariness was starting to catch up with them both. “You should get some rest, “ Grissom said, picking up his jacket off the sofa. “I’ll come back tonight…if that’s okay?”

“Can you stay?” Sara asked, suddenly not wanting to be alone, surprising both herself and Grissom by her request.

“At least until I can sleep?” she added, thinking of the night she’d asked him that very same thing, when she’d finally told him about the night her mother killed her father.

_He’d stayed until Ecklie’s numerous calls had demanded he return to the lab. But still he waited until she was asleep before he left the apartment. She awoke two hours later._

_Although she loved the comfort of Grissom’s presence as she finally slumbered, she awoke lonely. That was until she wandered into her living room. The last words she remembered him saying was he would return as soon as he could. And he did. She’d found him stretched out, dead to the world, on her sofa. She gently revived him, garnering a sleepy smile for her efforts. She gestured silently towards the bedroom, and he slowly rose from the sofa and followed her to the bedroom._

As he had that first time, Grissom toed off his shoes and stretched out next to her on the bed, but on top of the covers. Once he was settled, she smuggled up next to him, with a sigh of contentment.

“Thank you,” Sara whispered, after a few minutes as she played with the buttons of his shirt. “For…staying…”

His hand covered hers, stilling her restless fingers on his buttons.

“Sweetheart, you don’t need to thank me. I’m not going anywhere.” He gave her a one-armed hug. “Now get some rest."

* * *

 

Sara frowned in her sleep as the voices all mingled into one, as her head moved restlessly on the pillow. She instinctively moved closer to Grissom, and the voices of her dream silenced and she grew restful. Grissom continued to sleep soundly, beside her, automatically drew her closer to his body.

But even as she slept, Grissom’s soothing presence wasn’t enough to silence Adam Trent’s voice as he haunted Sara’s dreams. Her heart rate increased, as she felt the very real pressure of the shiv against her throat. The fear and panic of her nightmare was as debilitating as it was in reality. Her hair became damp and clung to her face as sweat beaded her skin. Her body twitched as she re-enacted her struggle with Adam.

Her strangled cry woke Grissom with a start.

Seeing her sitting upright and trembling from her nightmare, Grissom squeezed her shoulders soothingly and drew her to close to him in a tight embrace. He rubbed her back in soothing circles as he spoke softly to her.

“I’m here, honey. It’s okay,” he rocked her back and forth, until finally the trembling began to subside.

“I’m sorry,” she said, quietly, looking ashamed as she tucked her hair behind her ear.

Gently, Grissom reached out and gently lifted her chin until she looked at him, tentatively.

“Sweetheart, you don’t need to be sorry about anything,” he said, tucking the errant stand of hair behind her ear. “Your mind’s working overdrive trying to make sense of what happened. Don’t bottle anything up, but don’t be sorry. There’s no reason for you to be sorry. I’m the one who should be sorry.”

He drew her to him and giving her a reassuring squeeze. He glanced at his watch, it was just after 5:30 p.m.

He kissed the top of her head making a quick decision. “Come on, “ he said releasing his hold on her and scooting of the bed, to find his shoes which he’d kicked off earlier.

“A change of scenery will do you some good; maybe help take your mind off things. You’ll need something warm for later.”

He turned to face her, leaning over the bed, and kissing her quickly on the forehead.

“Can you be ready in ten minutes?” he asked, before rising from the bed, and leaving the bedroom, to give Sara some privacy.

* * *

 

 After leaving her apartment, Grissom and Sara headed back to his townhouse, where Grissom showered and changed, before grabbing a few things they’d need for later that night. Whenever Sara asked what he’d had planned for their spur of the moment date, Grissom changed the subject.

Once he had everything ready, he grabbed her hand, leading her back to his car and driving to the Strip. Their destination: the Belagio Hotel and Casino.

After leaving the car with the valet, Grissom took her hand in his, as they headed to the front of the hotel. Once in the Lobby, Grissom turned right and headed towards the Conservatory along with a throng of other people heading in the same direction. 

They’d lost track of time, as they slowly meandered their way around the gardens, and the colourful vibrant displays of the flowers, plants, shrubs and trees.

Sara had stood in front of one display that caught her eye. It was a 26-foot-tall red and white striped lighthouse, high-flying colourful kites and over-sized sunflowers. In another was an aviary with fifty live finches inside, and three larger than life colourful birds in flight, hanging above it. Pink and yellow flowers surrounded both sides of the aviary; as two tall shrubs stood guard at its entrance.

After finding a place to eat, Grissom led them back to the car, refusing to reveal the secret of their next destination.  Grissom had been determined to distract her from her nightmare and Sara had to admit, she was relishing  this time with him.

They left the glitz and lights of Vegas behind them as Grissom drove them towards the desert. They travelled in companionable silence, and once they’d left the Strip behind, Grissom turned to her, with a crooked smile and took her hand in his, refusing to let go.

They drove six or seven miles out into the desert until Grissom found the perfect spot.  As darkness descended over the desert, Grissom set up the telescope he'd collected from home and stretched out a blanket. The jagged outline of a mountain range pierced the darkening sky in the distance.

A meteor shower lit up the sky and Sara watched, fascinated. Grissom's smile was knowing and Sara realized that this had been the reason he'd brought her there.

They were packing everything up as the first rays of the early morning sunrise began to tinge the distant sky pink.

Sara paused in her packing, as a colony of bats fluttered overheard, heading home to roost, as the sun's rays edged the tip of the mountain in a liquid fire.

"It's beautiful," she whispered as she continued to watch as the sun rise a little higher.

"Yeah, it is," Grissom agreed, but when Sara turned to face him, he wasn't look at the mountains, but at her.

His hand was at her waist, drawing her closer. His head dipped, capturing her mouth with his own. His put his arms around her, drawing her closer to his body. He straightened up slightly, making Sara stand on tiptoe briefly before he set her on her feet again.

As the kiss deepened, Sara's hand came to rest on the back of his head, a soft moan of pleasure escaping her throat before she could suppress it.

The sun continued to rise, banishing the shadows as they continued to kiss on the outcrop of rock, this time uninterrupted by ringing cell phones.

 


	3. Chapter 3

Over the next two weeks, they made up for what Sara silently referred to herself, as lost kissing time. And learned that she really didn’t give a damn about beard burn.

They knew they were heading into dangerous waters, when they’d forgotten themselves at a crime scene. They’d bent over to grab their kits and Grissom had brushed against her. Sara had turned to face him with a teasing smile on her face, their faces only inches apart. They’d moved as one, the draw to one another, irresistible. Grissom had palmed her cheek, drawing her closer as the kiss deepened, before both pulled back, both panting heavily. Grissom had looked around wide eyed, checking to see if anyone had seen. Luckily, it had looked as if they’d gotten away with it, this time. But both agreed that they’d have to be much more careful – at work at least.

In the comfort of their homes, it was a different, much more pleasurable story.

“I should go,” Grissom said, as they stood at the door of Sara’s apartment, before resuming his attack of Sara’s mouth, kissing her passionately as her hands raked through his curls, with a soft moan of pleasure.

Sara pulled back a few moments later, a knowing smile on her face. “That’s what you said fifteen minutes ago.”

“You’re over talking again, dear,” Grissom mumbled, before silencing her with another passionate onslaught. Once he started, he just couldn’t seem to stop.

They’d spent a lot of time in each other’s homes, although Sara spent most of the time at Grissom’s townhouse. Tonight, however, they’d had dinner and a movie at Sara’s apartment, although once they were settled on the sofa, the movie had been largely forgotten.

“I really should go,” Grissom said, as he drew back, breaking the kiss, when the need to breathe became a necessity.

“You could stay,” Sara responded, as he opened the door and turned to kiss her goodbye, her face still flushed and her lips swollen from the through make out session.

“Soon, sweetheart,” he replied, managing to catch the look of disappointment in her brown eyes, before it was gone. His stomach flipped, nervously at her disappointment. This wasn’t the first time, she’d asked him to stay, nor was it the first time he’d refused.

Not knowing how to put his fears into words, he kissed her goodbye lightly on the cheek before heading towards his car.

Once at his car, Grissom had a bad case of doubt. As he debated with himself of whether he should go back, he glanced up at Sara’s apartment window. It was already in darkness. He shook his head slightly; disgusted with himself at his hesitation, and for allowing his reservations to get the better of him.

It wasn’t that he didn’t want to make love to her. Every time they were together, his body reacted to her proximity, and it would take all his self-control not to give in. The reality was, despite Sara’s insistence that their age gap made no difference to her, he was still fifteen years her senior. She was young and beautiful, while he…he was middle aged with a body that wasn’t as trim as it used to be in his youthful days. Would the stark reality be enough to change her mind? Would it drive her into the arms of another man, a man closer to her own age? Would he be enough for her?

He’d had a few relationships in the past, but they had been with women closer to his own age, so it hadn’t been a concern. But with Sara, it was very different. Until he’d met her, he’d never truly been in love with anyone. From the moment he’d met her, she’d had the power to bring him to his knees, if she’d so chose. She’d gotten under his skin in ways he hadn’t allowed other women to. He’d been in love with her from the moment they’d met, and that had scared the hell out of him.

He sighed, as he glanced at her darkened window again, hoping he’d not messed things up over his performance anxiety and doubts. Sara was everything to him, and he wanted their first time to be special – for her.

**

The next day they worked separate cases that led to working double shifts. They barely had time to acknowledge one another before rushing off to their respective crime scenes to chase up yet another lead or follow up on lab results.

A break in Grissom’s case afforded him enough time to track Sara to her crime scene, and under the guise of taking a break, and surprising her with “lunch” managed to grab some precious moments with her.

Thinking that perhaps she’d said something wrong, Sara had been the first to start to apologize for putting him on the spot the last time they’d spent time together. He’d gently silenced her, before offering his own typical Grissom apology.

It didn’t take long for Sara to fully grasp what he was trying to say, and after checking the coast was clear first, she’d wrapped her arms around him reassuringly, as she pressed a kiss to his cheek, before quickly releasing him.

With the air cleared between them, and their shift finally over, they headed back to Grissom’s townhouse and after a quick breakfast, had fallen into an exhausted sleep on the bed, still fully clothed wrapped in each other's arms.

**

One of the most horrific ordeals the two of them had faced was Nick’s kidnapping. The two worked non-stop, until their maxed out overtime gave Ecklie no other choice than to give the two workaholics time off.

On the Saturday after Nick’s kidnapping Grissom and Sara took advantage of their time off. Grissom took Sara to a newly opened restaurant, before taking in a musical. It was around midnight that he drove her to his townhouse.

He glanced quickly at Sara from the corner of his eye as he drove. He’d hardly been able to take his eyes off her all evening. When he’d picked her up from her apartment for their date, the purple cocktail dress she was wearing took his breath away. She was breathtaking. Her hair was tied up, with a few strands allowed to hang loose to frame her face, and she wore only a little make up. She’d completed the look, with a small gold cut out circle necklace and a small gold purse.

When he picked her up, she had smiled shyly at him, and twirled around asking if she looked okay.

“You are stunning,” he’d barely managed to say, before kissing her cheek and leading her to his car. Anything more than the chaste kiss, and he’d really have to cancel his plans.

Once at the townhouse, Sara took off her heels as they headed into the house, and once the door was firmly closed behind them, unable to resist any longer, Grissom pulled her close against his body and thoroughly kissed her.

When they broke apart, they were both breathless, their faces flushed, eyes bright, happy smiles on their faces.

“How about a nightcap?” he asked rising an eyebrow, after they’d kissed again, and Grissom had released her, pulling off his bow tie, loosening the top button of his shirt, before discarding his tuxedo jacket on the back of a chair as he passed on his way to the kitchen.

Sara wandered over to the living room, putting on the music centre. Vivaldi’s _Four Seasons_ began to play, and as Sara turned the volume down low for background noise, she spotted the chess game they were in the middle of playing. She paused, thinking of her next move, feeling Grissom’s eyes watching her, and the corners of mouth lifted upwards. He hadn’t been able to take his eyes off her all night. She moved her chess piece, before returning to the kitchen, where Grissom handed her a glass of wine.

Smiling her thanks she took a sip, leaning against the counter next to him. She placed the glass on the counter and half turned to face him.

“I’ve really enjoyed tonight, Gil,” she whispered, her hands running up the front of his shirt. She could feel his heart racing frantically. He placed his own glass on the countertop next to hers, and shifting slightly to accommodate her, he pulled her a little closer.

He brought both hands up to frame her face; his thumbs brushed tenderly, over her face.

“I treasure every moment with you,” he whispered, caught in the moment, his gaze not leaving hers. “No one else has ever made me feel like you do. So alive…I feel like I’m twenty again.” He paused, his fingers caressed her cheek, trailing over her lips. “Thank you, for not giving up on me.”

Sara’s eyes closed briefly as she leaned into his caress, her breath catching slightly. She opened her eyes and stepped closer to him, her hands moving up his chest to rest lightly on his shoulders.

“I almost did,” she said in a voice just barely audible.

He sighed contentedly, and tightened his arms around her as he dipped his head.

“I’m a very fortunate man,” he muttered as he kissed her softly.

They kissed slowly at first, savouring the moment. A moan of pleasure rumbled from his throat, giving voice to his raising desire, as the kiss deepened. He pulled her tighter against his body, his heart raced along with the pressure of his arousal, pressed against Sara’s thigh.

Sara moaned with desire, as she pressed even closer to him, her hands raking through his hair, as his hips involuntarily flexed upwards, his hands tentatively exploring her body.

“Stay,” he whispered in a strained voice, when they breathlessly broke apart, his desire reflected back at him in Sara’s eyes.

Even as she murmured her consent his mouth was on hers, kissing her fiercely, has he begun to walk her to his bedroom, their lips never breaking contact.

He kicked the door shut with his foot as he turned her around towards his bed, his head dipping to kiss her neck and bare shoulders, his touch and kisses searing her skin.

She kissed him with as much fervour, as her trembling fingers unfastened the buttons on his shirt just as he found the clasp of her dress. They broke apart as the dress swiftly pooled at their feet, and Grissom took a moment to admire her slender form.

She’d been braless under her dress and he felt his desire for her grow. “So beautiful,” he whispered, kissing her once more, his hands caressing her breasts.

Grissom’s lips moved to a sensitive spot behind her ear, and she shivered. She felt him smile against her skin, as he sucked the spot before moving down her neck to the base of her throat, before leaving a trail of kisses making his way to her breast. He took a nipple into his mouth, and Sara groaned her pleasure, as his touch seared his fingerprints into her flesh, their souls entwining.

She pushed the shirt off his shoulders, and Grissom felt a moment of doubt, as Sara’s hands explored his chest, moving down to the slight roundness of his stomach. He relaxed as her hands moved back up his chest, as she hummed in pleasure as she kissed his chest, nibbling his nipples, lightly.

Capturing her mouth again, he gently pushed her onto the bed, lying next her as they began to explore each other’s bodies, Grissom committing to memory all the places that brought her the most pleasure.

Sara kissed any exposed skin she could find, his shoulders, his neck, his ears, as her hands travelled down his back, tracing his spine. Realising that he still wore his trousers, she quickly unfastened his belt and zipper, and pulled the slacks past his ankles. She could feel his erection straining against its fabric prison, and hooked her fingers in the waistband of his boxers to shed them.

Grissom quickly kicked them off and resumed where he’d left off, exploring Sara’s body. She reached for him, and he gasped sharply as she stroked him. She stilled her hand.

“Slow down, sweetheart, I want to last,” he said softly. "Next time."

He continued to kiss and taste and lick his way down to her stomach, his hands tugging down her panties, as he kissed his way down her leg to her foot. Her legs quivered, as his beard scratched against her skin, driving her wild with desire and her hands fisted into the sheets with a groan.

He worked his way up the other leg, taking his time, before reaching her centre. He kissed her inner thigh, before gently pressing one finger into her folds, discovering how wet for him she was. She gasped his name in a breathy whisper as he inserted another finger. He made slow teasing circles as he rubbed the tiny bundle of nerves.

He kissed her centre and Sara dug deeper into the mattress as his clever tongue licked and sucked. Her hands gripped his curls as Sara moaned with need. He continued to tease her endlessly, until he could feel her body tremble. Her back arched, as her hips rose to meet his mouth with a moan of pure pleasure, her hands fisted in the sheets.

She tugged him towards her, kissing him on the mouth, the neck. He moaned as she sucked his earlobe and his hips involuntarily thrust upwards, his erection brushing against her thigh. He pulled away from her just long enough to reach into the drawer of his nightstand to find a condom.

He left a trail of kisses down to her stomach, and as he settled himself between her legs he glanced at her as if asking permission. She nodded, as her legs parted, granting him access.

She gasped, as he slowly entered her, and he paused, before slowly thrusting forward. He leaned forward slightly, his arms taking his weight as he rocked gently, his head dipping as he kissed her, her arms wrapping around his neck.

They rocked gently together, as they found their rhythm. Gradually he gained speed, his desire for her overwhelming, as hers was for him. He continued to thrust harder and faster, until he could feel her walls clamp around him and her back arched as her legs wrapped around his thighs, with a loud groan of pleasure.

He pumped into her twice more; sweat beaded on his forehead and back, as a low, guttural groan escaped his throat as his own powerful release quickly followed Sara’s. His arms quivering, exhausted he fell to the side, his body half covering hers. Sara held his head to her chest, as they both lay catching their breaths.

“Jesus, Sara,” Grissom muttered still trying to catch his breath.

After a moment, he started to move, but Sara tightened her legs around him keeping him place.

“Not yet,” she whispered, her face still flushed as she kissed his sweaty curls.He adjusted his weight and kissed her gently.

They laid there together a little while longer, but the next time Grissom moved to rise, she didn't stop him. He rose from the bed, heading towards the bathroom to dispose of the condom. She heard the flush of the toilet, before the sound of running water followed. When he returned his was wearing a fresh pair of boxers. 

He slipped into the covers next to her. She moved into the spot by his left shoulder, and as she nestled down he wrapped his arm around her. He kissed her hair. 

“Are you okay?” he asked. 

She kissed his chest, and he felt the stirrings of desire in his groin. 

“I’m fine,” she replied her fingers making a lazy pattern on his bare chest. “I’m more than fine. You’re a man of many hidden talents, Gilbert. Such a stallion.” 

Grissom chuckled even as pink tinged his cheeks and the tips of his ears turned red. His hand tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, before pulling her head forward and kissing her deeply. His fears that he wouldn’t be enough for her were appeased, for now, by her words. His heart swelled with the love he felt for her. 

They broke apart, and Sara settled down in the space by his shoulder, her arm draped over his chest. As Grissom drew her closer to his body, drowsiness enveloped their bodies and they drifted off with satisfied smiles on their lips. 

The next morning, Sara woke as sunlight fell across her face. She lay quietly with her eyes closed, feeling completely relaxed. She opened her eyes and shut them at the sun streaming in from the partially opened curtains, before her eyes flew open again. 

The sunlight was wrong, and she felt a moment of panic as the thought that this wasn’t her bedroom flashed across her mind. Before remembering where she was. 

She stretched languidly, a smile brightening her features, as she glanced to Grissom’s side of the bed. It was empty and she felt a stab of anxiety twist her stomach as her smile faded. Was he having doubts about making love to her? Had he run? 

With her unease growing she rummaged around on the floor, for something to put on. The first item her hands happened to fall on was Grissom's shirt. 

She slipped it over her head, the hem falling to mid-thigh, and she rolled up the sleeves to accommodate her smaller arms, before slipping out of the bedroom, and making her way to the kitchen. 

Halfway there, her stomach growled hungrily as the delicious smell of cooking filled the air. She felt a little of her anxiety fade. Maybe she didn’t have anything to worry about after all? 

She hesitated a moment, watching him potter about the kitchen, before stepping into the living room. 

He looked up and the smile he offered her eased a little more of her doubts. His hair was still mussed from sleep, and at some point he’d put on a pair of pyjama bottoms and a t-shirt. 

“Morning, beautiful,” he greeted, the smile broadening as she approached the breakfast bar. A radio was playing quietly in the corner, and the Sunday paper was already folded to the crossword puzzle. 

He waited until she approached before handing her a coffee.

“Sleep okay?” he asked as she took the offered cup and holding it with both hands, blew a cooling breath before taking a sip. Her eyes watched him over the rim of her cup. 

_As if he really needed to ask that!_ she thought. She placed the cup on the counter and tugged at the shirt collar, nervously. “Actually, I think that was the best nights sleep I’ve had in a long time,” Sara admitted shyly. There had certainly been no nightmares to plague her dreams. 

His smile grew shy as he nodded his head. “Me too,” he acknowledged, as his eyes roamed over her from head to foot.

“Is something wrong?” Sara asked becoming slightly worried under his scrutinizing gaze. Looking down at the shirt briefly, she wondered if perhaps she’d overstepped some line, wearing his clothes.  “Is it the shirt?” she asked. 

Grissom smirked and turned his attention back to the pancakes he was making. After what they’d shared the night before, she was worried about wearing his _shirt?_

“No, honey,” he said as he plated the pancakes and added an assortment of fruit before drizzling them liberally with maple syrup. “However, I was going to surprise you with breakfast in bed. You looked so peaceful I hesitated to wake you.” 

“I’m sorry I spoilt your surprise,” Sara smiled, as she played with the collar of the shirt. “Maybe you can surprise me next time?” 

She gave him her full Sidle smile, making his heart beat that much faster.She clearly had no idea what she was doing to him, wearing his shirt.

"Come here,” he said, his voice, low and seductive, his gaze growing more intense as he lost all interest in the food. 

Sara felt heat between her legs as her heart skipped a beat. Grissom leaned back against the counter as she approached, the obvious tenting in his pyjama bottoms plain to see as he gathered her into his arms. He bent to kiss her and Sara leaned back slightly. 

“I’ve not brushed my teeth.” 

Grissom rolled his eyes, with a slight shake of his head before kissing her anyway. 

His hands slipped under the shirt, his hands sliding over her sides, his fingertips skimmed over her breasts, his thumbs teasing her nipples, as the kiss quickly became heated. He groaned as he felt Sara’s hands slip under his own t-shirt and slide over his stomach and chest. His arms tightened around her.

“Maybe I should wear your shirt all the time,” Sara mused when they parted. “If this is the effect it has on you." 

“Honey, you could wear a garbage bag, and I’d still want you,” he responded his breathing still uneven, as his head lowered, his mouth already seeking hers.

Somehow, they found their way to the bedroom again, breakfast forgotten.


	4. Chapter 4

After that first time together, they’d not gone more than a day, two at most, without making love. It was inevitable, Sara mused thoughtfully, as their bond deepened they’d became less cautious, especially when at one of the other’s homes, unaware that they were being observed.

Their new relationship began in April 2005. They thought they could keep it a secret for as long as they needed as long as they desired. But by August 2005 — a mere four months — the cat was out of the bag.

_Mid August 2005_

Grissom had been called into court as an expert witness on a high-profile case. After his job was complete, he went to Sara’s apartment and let himself in with the key she’d given him. He leaned his head back against the door with a weary sigh. He dropped his briefcase to the floor but kept hold of his suit jacket, as he pinched his eyes closed at the brightness of the late afternoon sun. He pulled at his collar, loosening his tie, before unbuttoning the top two buttons of his shirt.

Still towelling dry her hair after her shower and wearing her robe, Sara came out of the bedroom, and didn’t see Grissom standing with his back to her front door, and his head bowed. She gasped in surprise, having not expected to see him until much later due to the court case. It was his night off and they’d planned on having dinner at his place before the start of her shift.

“Hello, Gilbert, “ her tone teasing once she’d gotten over her surprise at seeing him.

She knew there was something wrong when he didn’t react to the use of his full name, a privilege that only a very few had. Discarding the towel she went him, her concern growing.

“Gil?” she asked softly, cupping his cheek. “What’s wrong?”

He lifted his head only slightly, and she noticed the paleness of his skin, and the pain in his eyes as he gave her only the briefest of glances before pinching his eyes shut again, as his lips thinned.

Still holding his jacket, and keeping his back to the door, he pulled her closer to him, his arms wrapping around her waist, as his head sank into the space between her shoulder and neck.

“Migraine,” he mumbled, his breath and the whiskers of his beard tickling her skin.

“How long since you took any medication?” she wanted to know, as she draped her arms around his neck, her fingers brushing through his hair, with a feather-light touch, but even that light caress was enough to make him groan.

Immediately she dropped her hand, not wanting to cause him any further pain and discomfort. It must be a really bad one, if even the gentle of touches was painful.

“Second dose was almost fours ago,” he mumbled against her neck, his lips brushing against her skin.

His arms tightened around her slightly, as he nuzzled against her neck. He sighed, a happy sound despite the pounding of his migraine. In the recent months since their relationship had begun, he’d learned the true meaning of home wasn’t defined by bricks and mortar, but Sara. Home was wherever she happened to be.

“I love you,” he muttered against her neck suddenly, as his lips brushed against her neck, not realising that he’d put what he was thinking into words.

Sara drew back, her look of surprise at his admission not registering with Grissom, as he drew back, and released his hold her, and lifted up his jacket as he rummaged around in the left pocket.

“I have something for you,” he said, suddenly overcome with nerves that Sara somehow knew had nothing to do with his first declaration of his love.

With nerveless fingers, feeling very much like a teenager, he searched in his jacket before he withdrew an oblong box out of his jacket pocket.

“I was at lunch, and I saw this, I-I- it made me think of you,” his voice shy, as he handed her the black velvet box.

Sara mutely took the box from him, still reeling from his admission. She’d received a few gifts from him over the years, but apart from an entomology textbook one Christmas, nothing as personal as this appeared to be.

She glanced up at him, as he watched her expectantly. Glancing back down she carefully opened the lid.

Resting on a black velvet bed was a sapphire gemstone necklace in the shape of a teardrop; the outer edge of the gemstone was encased in a gold plated bail.

“You like it?” he asked hopefully.

She looked up at him, still feeling a sense of shock at his unexpected and thoughtful gift.

“Like it?” she asked, carefully lifting the necklace out of the box. “Gil, I love it, it's beautiful!”

“It represents your birth month, I know it’s early… “ He’s voice trailed off as he gave a little shrug, his mouth pursing slightly.

Opening the clasp, she turned around lifting her hair up, so he could fasten it for her.

“Thank you,” she said when she turned back to face him, and kissed him lightly on the mouth.

His hands settled on her waist as he pulled her a little closer as he returned her kiss, briefly, before drawing back, with a wince.

Grasping his hand as she turned on her heels, she led him to the sofa, and while he sat down, she hurriedly drew the curtains shut, blocking out most of the late afternoon sun.

Grissom leaned back, resting his head on the back of the sofa, with his eyes closed, rubbing at the temple on the right side of his head. Sara headed to the kitchen to fill a glass with water and find his spare bottle of his medication.

“Have you had anything to eat?” she asked as she returned to the sofa, setting down the glass and two of his pills.

“Not since lunch,” he whispered with a slight shake of his head.

He winced, his face draining of whatever colour he had, his eyes springing open, he pushed himself to his feet, as a wave of nausea swept over him.

Head spinning, nausea unsettling his stomach he stumbled his way to the bathroom, just barely making it in time, as he fell to his knees over the toilet.

Sara hovered close by, but enough to give him some privacy. Worry etched onto her features. She waited until she heard the toilet flush, before knocking once, before entering the bathroom.

He’s head was resting on the closed lid of the toilet, facing away from her.

“I’m sorry,” he muttered, as he blew out a weak, pain filled breath. He swallowed heavily, fighting against another wave of nausea.

Sara knelt by his side, her hand gently rubbing across his shoulders and down his back, comfortingly.

“You’ve nothing to be sorry for, baby.”

She’d only ever seen him this ill with a migraine only a handful of times over the years, and only twice when he’d visited her in San Francisco. When it got this bad, the only relief that seemed to work, was sleep and complete quite.

She was about to suggest that he lay down when he quickly lifted the toilet lid again.

Rising to her feet, Sara left him briefly, returning a few minutes later with another glass of water. After rinsing his mouth out, she helped to his feet, beads of sweat standing out vividly against the whiteness of his face.

Silently she led him to the bed, where he lay down without much protest, his eyes already closed as his head hit the pillow. Sara lifted his legs up, and took off his shoes, before pulling the thin sheet up over him.

She glanced at the nightstand, making sure that the glass of water and the two pills were within easy reach, for when he awoke.

Her concerned eyes swept over him as he’s breathing became shallow as a healing sleep overtook him. Briefly she debated with herself of if she should stay with him, instead of heading into work.

She shook her head at the notion, knowing that there really wasn’t much she could do. Sleep and rest was the only thing that would help him now, and he could sleep for hours.

Bending down she lightly brushed her lips against his temple, her fingers touching his greying curls. He winced slightly even in sleep, but moved into her slight caress seeking her touch all the same.

“I love you, too, Gil,” she whispered to his sleeping form, a sad smile gracing her face at seeing him in pain. She kissed him lightly once more, making Grissom sigh contentedly, before she quietly left the bedroom.

**

While she had thrown herself into work as normal, part of Sara’s mind still drifted back to Grissom. When Greg suggested a break, she’d agreed and took the opportunity to quickly head back to her apartment and check on Grissom.

She entered her bedroom to find an empty bed and his untouched medication on the nightstand. She’d found him looking exhausted and white as a sheet as he was bent over the toilet. Dry as dry heaves wrecked his body.

After enquiring if he could manage anything to eat, he’d shaken his head, bringing a wince and hiss of pain. She’d guided him back to bed, this time helping him to strip to his boxers before pulling the sheets up close to his chin. His eyes tightly closed even against the muted light coming from the living room. She’d stayed with him, until his face and body relaxed as sleep claimed him once more.

After her shift, Sara dropped off her at the mechanic for routine maintenance and caught a ride home from the shop’s owner. By the time she’d returned home, she’d found Grissom sprawled on her side of the bed, hugging her pillow and the glass empty, and his pills gone. Witnessing that offered her much relief.

She’d headed back to the kitchen to make a start on breakfast. She was clearing away her dirty dishes when she felt his arms around her waist and the brush of his lips against her neck.

With a smile, she’d turned around in his arms, happy to see that although still pale he looked much better.

“You still in pain?”

“It’s there, but bearable,” he said. He gave her a slow minty kiss that had built into something much more heated, and left them both breathless when they pulled apart.

Sara awoke at three in the afternoon, to find Grissom had returned to bed at some point, his arm laying  possessively over her stomach. She took a moment to watch him sleeping, a tender smile on her face. Even in sleep he looked much better than he had that morning over breakfast.

She touched his cheek lovingly, and he instinctively moved closer to her, seeking her touch. She softly kissed his forehead before extracting herself from his embrace and quietly leaving the bedroom.

After a few house chores, Sara went for a run. She returned to find Grissom up and cooking in the kitchen. It was a pleasant surprise.

“Hey there.”

“Hi dear,” he said, as he approached her for a kiss. “I’m making dinner.”

“Well, that’s a good sign you’re feeling better,” Sara said caressing his arm. “But maybe you should think about a sick day today.”

“That’s not necessary. I’ve already had a call with Ecklie who wants to meet me after shift,” Grissom said, as he turned down the stove, frowning at the concoction on the second burner. “You need a better sauté pan."

“I have a sauté pan?”

Grissom chuckled. “Go shower.”

“Why? Do I stink?”

“No. But your sauté pan does.”

Sara shrugged.

“You do know I only use that thing to heat up ketchup for my spaghetti?” Although she said the line with a straight face, the incredulous look on Grissom’s face made her crack up. “I’m just teasing.”

“Good.”

“I heat up the ketchup when I put the spaghetti in the microwave.”

Grissom sighed.

“You’re a regular comedian.”

“Thank you,” she said with her smile reserved for him. “Do you think you feel good enough to drive me to the mechanic before it closes?”

“Yes, but that won’t be necessary. He called while you were out. The Prius won’t be ready until early afternoon tomorrow.”

“Oh crap,” Sara said, “I have court first thing in the morning."

“So take the Mercedes after shift,” Grissom said. “You’d have to call someone to give you a ride tonight anyway, so I can drive you in. You can get ready at the lab and take the Mercedes to the courthouse while I have meetings.”

The offer surprised Sara.

“You trust me with your Merc, Gil?”

_I trust you with my heart_ , he thought. He didn’t say it out loud but hoped the look on his face convinced her.

Sara approached him and placed her palm on his cheek, which he leaned into lovingly.

“Thank you,” she said softly. They shared a kiss and she made her way to the shower.

**

Brass pulled his Dodge into the parking lot of the Clark County Courthouse hoping for a good space. Seeing as it was 10 a.m., there was the off chance people with early morning business might be leaving offering a prime empty spot.

He was rounding a corner when he saw what looked like Grissom’s Mercedes. He knew Grissom was often called to testify, so seeing his car hadn’t been that unusual.

 A spot became available a few cars down and on the other side of Grissom’s car. Brass turned around again and saw Grissom’s crime lab parking tag, confirming it was definitely his friend’s car. He was about to call Grissom’s cell phone and see if his friend might want to meet for lunch, when he spotted Sara emerging from the stairwell.

 Brass looked around and noticed what he didn’t see was Sara Sidle’s white Prius. As she approached Grissom’s car, Brass scanned the lot for Grissom who was nowhere in sight. His curiosity peaked further, when Sara unlocked the car, slipping into the driver’s seat.

_Why would Sara be driving Grissom’s car?_ Brass thought.

He checked his watch one more time. Knowing his business at the courthouse was not pressing, he changed his plans. He could come back later.

Now with more than a casual hint of curiosity, Brass waited for Sara to pull out and then followed after her.

Seeing Sara return to the CSI lot wasn’t too surprising. Neither was seeing Grissom in the lot waiting for her. _OK, she borrowed_ _his car and is returning it to him,_ Brass thought. _Then why isn’t he driving?_

It was that question that caused Brass to continue his tail on the Mercedes.

When Sara slowed to pull into a mechanic lot, Brass turned into a nearby convenience store to park his car and witness what was going on.

_OK, so she drove straight from CSI because Grissom might have been tired. I heard he had a migraine that took him out of commission,_ Brass thought as he continued to watch the couple. Sara parked the Mercedes right next to her awaiting Prius. She popped out of the driver’s seat and jogged into the office, while Grissom took his time leaving the passenger seat and meandering to the driver’s side.

 Brass wondered why Grissom didn’t just leave at this point.

_Oh, she must still have the keys,_ the detective speculated. _She’s coming back outside now. Yeah… there she is giving him the keys… Oh…_ Brass’ eyes became wider and focused keener on the couple from afar. _I guess she needed to give him her tongue too._

After they shared their “clearly they are not just coworkers or friends” kiss, Sara and Grissom went into their respective cars and headed into the same direction. The opposite direction from Grissom’s townhouse, but the correct direction for Sara’s apartment.

  _Or maybe Grissom was going to a market in that direction,_ Brass speculated, laughing at his own clearly erroneous assumption. His hunch pointed to only one logical conclusion, one that made him smile.

He still had to go to the courthouse, but he might make a visit someplace else later in the day.

 


	5. Chapter 5

Grissom followed Sara to her apartment to relax and enjoy a meal together. After they made light work of clearing away the dirty dishes, Grissom returned to his chair, as Sara brought mugs of coffee for them both to the dining table. She’d barely set them down before Grissom grabbed her and pulled her into his lap, as he kissed her.

“Thank you,” he said, when he pulled back. “For everything.” 

Sara rested her hands on the back of his head, her gaze holding with his.

“I really didn’t do much of anything,” she replied truthfully.

Grissom remained silent, biting his bottom lip deep in thought as he brought his hand up to brush the back of his hand against her cheek. Sara’s eyes closed as she leaned automatically into his touch, her breath hitching slightly, as her body awakened to his touch.

  
He shifted slightly, as he leaned forward and she gasped audibly as she felt the soft brush of lips against the skin of her neck and she moved her head to the side to give him better access. His lips moved to that spot behind her ear that made her shiver, and she moaned softly. He kissed her neck, and along her collarbone, moving the strap of her tank top, to kiss her shoulder, before pulling back completely.

 He still held her gaze, his growing desire reflected back at him. He took a deep breath and moved his head to the side as though in an attitude of listening. His Adam’s apple bobbed nervously as he whispered “I love you,"

It wasn’t the first time he said it, but Sara’s breath still caught at his words. This time there could be no doubts, to his declaration. Her eyes searched his, as a slow smile lifted the corners of her mouth. Her hand touched his face, her fingers brushing through his greying curls.

“I love you, too,” she answered, her own voice just barely above a whisper.

“Yeah?” he asked, flashing his boyish rare grin, that took ten years off him, as he’s head moved towards hers.

 “Yeah,” Sara replied confidently as her head lowered to meet his, half way.

 The kiss was slow and deliberate, almost tentative, before growing more urgent and passionate. Grissom’s hands moved from her waist, travelling up her sides, the swell of her breasts, his thumbs brushing over her nipples, which hardened immediately.

 He kissed a trail of kisses to her neck, sucking and biting gently as he went, his hands, moving under tank top, the touch of his hands on her bare skin giving her goose bumps. Sara gasped as she shifted into a more comfortable position on his lap, and Grissom groaned as he moved against his growing arousal, biting a little too hard at the spot just above her collarbone.

Grissom tugged at the hem of her tank top pulling it upwards and they broke the kiss just longer enough for Sara to help pull it over her head. Still kissing, passionately, Grissom rose to his feet, taking Sara with him, as her fingers were busy with the buttons of his shirt.

Their lips never breaking contact with the other, they walked backwards, helping rid the other of the clothes that hindered their progress, just barely making it to the bed.

**

Some time later, Grissom entered the living room, tucking in his shirt, looking irritated. Sara followed a few seconds behind him, wearing sweatpants and a tank top, just as he was fastening the belt of his trousers.

Grissom looked up to face her, his displeasure clear on his face. “I’m really sorry about this, honey,” his tone apologetic, as he let out despondent sigh.

“It’s fine, Gil,” she tried to soothe him, reaching out to touch his cheek, which he instinctively leaned into, despite his bad mood. “I understand. It’s work…”

Gil blew out an annoyed snort of air through his noise, still looking far from happy.

“You’re worth more than a quick – “

Sara silenced him with a kiss, which after a second's delay he was only happy to return. They’d taken their time making love, thinking they had had more time than they actually had. Now, Grissom barely had enough time to return home, grab a quick shower and change of clothes before heading to the lab and the dreaded meeting with Ecklie.

The kiss deepened, as Grissom drew Sara closer to his body, as he lost himself in Sara.

The kiss continued until and the need for air, forced their lips apart.

“ _Again_?” Sara asked, with a raised eyebrow as she became aware of his growing arousal, as her own also reawakened in response to him 

He allowed a grin to replace his earlier bad mood.

“Can you blame me if I can’t get enough of you?” he murmured as his head dipped as he left an arousing trail of kisses down her neck, to the base of her throat. “I’ll never get enough of you,” his voice trailed off as he straightened up, his previous heated look disappearing.

“Oh dear,” he said sheepishly. “That’s not good.”

Alarmed Sara headed towards the mirror to the right of the living room window.

Moving her hair back, Sara gazed with dismay at the hickey on the right side of her throat close to her collarbone. It wasn’t very big, but it wouldn’t be easy to hide either. And it was still too hot to get away with wearing a turtleneck sweater.

“Gil, we agreed on no obvious marks,” Sara’s tone betraying her dismay. Beard burn she could deal with and was easier to hide. Generally, they were both discreet, though on occasion one or the other had been a little overzealous. Mostly in places that were easily hidden.

“I’m sorry, dear,” Grissom said contritely as he grabbed his suit jacket before embracing her from behind and kissing her hair. “I’ll see you later the lab.”

Sara stared at the love bite a moment longer, before sighing and heading back towards her bedroom to change the sheets and have a shower of her own, when she spotted Grissom’s car keys still on the breakfast bar where she’d placed them when she’d come back from the courthouse.

She quickly hurried from her apartment, just as the doors to the elevator closed, leaving her no choice but to take the stairs.

 

Twilight wasn’t far off, but there was still enough light for Jim Brass to see Gil Grissom, as he exited Sara’s apartment building. He had ran his errands and, on his hunch, returned to what he believed might be Grissom and Sara’s rendezvous spot.

Jim smirked to himself, knowingly, as he took in Grissom’s slightly dishevelled appearance — his mussed hair and tucked in collar of his hurriedly buttoned shirt, and untied tie hanging loose around his neck. He’d obviously left Sara’s in a hurry.

A few seconds later, Sara exited the building complex too, and approached Gil, dangling Grissom’s car keys by the key ring. From his vantage point, Jim could clearly make them out without being seen himself, but couldn’t hear what they were saying.

Grissom nodded, at something Sara said before her taking by the waist and pulling her closer to him, as they kissed. Sara’s arms snaked around his neck, her fingers raking through his hair as the kiss deepened.

As Brass continued to watch, Sara pushed Grissom away, breaking the kiss. Grissom smirked, keeping an arm around Sara’s waist almost possessively. He spoke a few words, making Sara laugh, then Grissom leaned forward, planting a kiss on Sara’s cheek, before releasing her, his smirk still firmly in place, as he turned back to his car.

He’d just pulled open the driver's side door when Sara called his name. He turned and Sara wrapped her arms around his neck again as she kissed him. Several more minutes passed before they broke apart, and Grissom got into his car and left Sara’s apartment building.

Waiting until both Grissom and Sara had gone, Jim left his hiding place and returned to his own car.

**

Towards the middle of shift, Brass made his way to Grissom’s office, report folder in hand. Inside Sara and Grissom seemed to be going over case notes. He hesitated a moment before making his presence known, taking his time to observe them.

Over the course of the shift, Jim had taken advantage of the chance to watch them as they worked their case together, without any hint of the personal relationship between them. If he hadn’t been privy to their passionate tryst he would never have suspected that there was anything going on between them, which was what they clearly wanted everyone to believe.

The only indication Brass had noticed, and even now he still wasn’t sure if he had seen it, had been when they had been in the layout room. Everyone else was still out working their own cases, and so Grissom and Sara had been alone – or as alone as they could be – in the lab.

Sara had seen something of interest in the evidence she was combing through and Grissom had stepped closer to her, closer than Jim would have deemed necessary, but that was nothing new between them. The look that had past between them had certainly been a few shades warmer than would have been deemed professional, before a second later their professional masks were firmly back in place, leaving Jim wondering if he’d ever seen it at all.

Jim knocked on the half open door to Grissom’s office as he entered, raising the folder up for them to see.

“Your suspect has a rap sheet as long as the proverbial arm of the law,” Jim stated, passing the folder over to Grissom, as he took the guest seat facing Grissom’s desk.

As they discussed the case between them, Sara fiddled with the collar of her shirt. She had thought it high enough to hide the hickey, but now that Brass was sitting right next to her, she wasn't so sure.

Finally, Brass rose to his feet, but made no effort to leave Grissom’s office, still debating with himself if he should come clean and admit that he’d seen them together. Whatever they did outside of the lab was their business. At the same time, if it had been anyone else that had discovered their secret, there was a high chance it would have reached the wrong ears, and both of their careers would be over. He respected both Grissom and Sara too much to allow that to happen.

Grissom looked up curiously from the report, his lips pursed thoughtfully 

“Something else I can help you with Jim?.

Pulling at the collar of his shirt, Brass hesitated briefly, before deciding to lay all his cards on the table. They were his friends and if they wanted this to remain private, then he’d have their backs.

“I mean this with the utmost respect to the two of you, but perhaps you two playing tonsil tennis in a parking lot, where anyone could happen by isn’t one of your better ideas. Even if it is the parking lot of an apartment complex, you know what I’m saying?”

Grissom hitched in a breath as if the room had suddenly been devoid of air, paling slightly, as both he and Sara straightened up slightly, as they glanced at each other, before turning to face Brass once more. They’d both been in agreement that if they were ever asked about their relationship, they wouldn’t lie. Really, what would be the point?

Swallowing, Grissom leaned further forward in his chair. “When did you…?”

“Earlier this afternoon. I saw Sara picking up your car from the courthouse. I got curious, and followed her,” Jim explained. “I saw you both at the mechanics and suspected you went together to Sara’s apartment. And you were, since I saw you making out in the parking lot there. I just want to give you a friendly heads up that it could easily have been someone else. Personally, I’m happy for you both. Whatever you two get up to outside the lab is your business. But leave necking in the parking lot to the teenagers, okay?” He paused for breath, before turning this attention to Sara.

“You’ve had a rough year or so, and I’m pleased for you, kiddo.” He nodded his head in Grissom’s direction. “I gave up on him years ago.”

Sara glanced in Grissom’s direction, a slight smirk on her face, as she boldly reached out and grasped his hand lightly in hers, and gently squeezed their joined hands. “I think he knows how close it almost came to that.”

Her pager beeped and she quickly released their joined hands to check. It was from Hodges. “I need to go. Thanks Jim, for the heads up. But for the record, maybe don’t hide in parking lots like a peeping Tom.”

Brass chuckled as Sara left, but barred Grissom’s exit. “I meant what I said to Sara about being happy for you both,” Brass said to his long-time colleague, his tone much more serious. “I’ll keep this to myself. She’s like a daughter to me, and if you mess with her heart again, Gil, let's just say I’ve learned a thing or two working with you CSI’s to know how to hide a body and get away with it.”

Jim paused a second or two longer, the silence heavy between them. While Grissom remained silent, Jim knew Grissom understood his implication very clearly. With that, he turned on his heels and left Grissom’s office, leaving Grissom with much to think about.

**

_Late July 2006_

Over the intervening fifteen months since they’d first started dating, Grissom and Sara had perfected the “rules” of their relationship even further. Timing their arrival or departure from the lab, so they never left or arrived at the same time. Days off together were scheduled so that they didn’t draw any attention. They worked cases together, occasionally paired with others or even solo.

By early 2006, they started living together. But Sara had kept her old apartment for appearance sake, heading back every few days to pick up mail and pay bills.

Spending so much time together, living and working together should have brought problems of their own, especially when one partner was the boss at work. By mutual agreement, whatever happened at work stayed at work. 

Occasionally they would enjoy time apart, to pursue other interests or just sit quietly reading or doing crosswords, quietly enjoying the others company without the need for conversation. One or the other looking over to their companion with a gentle smile. They were happy and they made their relationship work.

It was two weeks before celebrating a year and a half  together, that Grissom finally noticed that perhaps things between he and Sara weren’t as idyllic as he wanted to believe. She’d been ashen and withdrawn the last few days. At first, he’d just assumed that it was the after effects of the recent bout of stomach flu that had been going around. 

Now as Grissom stood by the door to their bedroom, watching as Sara sat silently on the edge of their bed, he wasn’t so sure. She was lost in thought, but he could see the worry on her pale face as she bit her lip.

“Honey, what’s bothering you?” he asked as he stepped further into the room. She jumped slightly, at the sound of his unexpected voice, and he quickly closed the space between them, and gathered her hands in both of his as he joined her on the bed.

Sara remained silent for a few minutes, trying to gather her thoughts together. Grissom’s hands squeezed hers reassuringly.

“Sara…”

“I’m not sure of how to tell you, how I feel,” she began; unable to look him in the eye, she kept her gaze fixed on the floor beneath her feet. “We’ve not really been together that long…”

“Honey, whatever is it is we can work through it,” Grissom interrupted in a rush, the idea that she wanted to end their relationship, bludgeoning its way into his mind. Since they’d been together, she’d taught him the true meaning of loneliness, and he was in no hurry to make its re-acquaintance.

Sara heard the underlying panic in his voice and squeezed their clasped hands reassuringly. Somehow managing to reassure herself that things could work out. She took a deep breath, before turning to face him. 

“I think I might be pregnant,” she blurted out, before she could lose her nerve. “ I-I-I know that it’s not something we’ve… 

Grissom cut her off mid sentence as he swept her into his arms and kissed her so deeply. It left them both breathless.

“Have you taken a test?” he asked  when they eventually broke apart.

Sara shook her head, biting her lip worriedly at the daunting possibility of impending motherhood. Because children had never been a topic they had ever discussed, she’d assumed that he didn’t want children. She wasn’t completely certain, given her upbringing that she did either. A future with Grissom had been all that she’d ever dared to hope for. If that meant a life without children, she would be more than content with that. At first, she’d thought it was just the after-effects of the stomach flu that had been going around. But when she realised she was two days late, she’d panicked, unsure of how Grissom would react. 

“I bought a test on they way home from the lab,” she said quietly, breaking out of her thoughts. “I’ve been sitting here trying to pick up the courage to take the test.”

“There’s only one way we’re going to find out, and staring at the floor isn’t the way,” he said, giving her hands another encouraging squeeze, he gently pulled her to her feet, before guiding her to the master bathroom.

Several minutes later, they were both sitting on the foot of the bed, as they waited nervously for the results of the pregnancy test.

Sara closed her eyes and blew out a nervous breath, as Grissom clasped her hands in his, squeezing gently.

“Whatever the outcome, we’ll deal with it,” he said reassuringly, before Sara rose to her feet, heading into the bathroom.

Grissom held his breath when she returned a second later, with the test in hand.

“Its negative,” she revealed as she blew out the breath she was holding, feeling a sudden surge of relief flood through her, while Grissom remained silent, looking thoughtful 

**

Much later, when they lay in bed together, Sara relished the feeling of Grissom’s arm around her. She snuggled closer to him as his fingers gently caressed her bare arm. They hadn’t made love but they’d enjoyed an intimacy all they same.

He’d been subdued since learning that the pregnancy test was negative. The silence stretched between the, until she finally asked him, “Penny for your thoughts?”

Grissom stayed silent for a moment before sighing and pursing his lips. He glanced at her briefly, before staring straight ahead again. He opened his mouth to speak, then closed it again without saying a word, his brows furrowing slightly.

Then, taking a deep breath he said, “My father died when I was nine. I sometimes wondered what kind of father I’d be. I’ve never felt quite ready. The idea even scares me a little. But today, when the test came back negative…” he’s voice trailed off as he lapsed once more into silence.

Surprised, Sara rose up onto an elbow, reaching out to caress his bearded cheek. The thought that he might have been disappointed at the negative result had never crossed her mind. She realized a seed had been planted.

“Since we’ve never talked about it, I assumed that children wasn’t something we’d consider.”

“To be honest, until this afternoon, neither did I,” he admitted quietly, as he turned onto his side facing her, resting on his elbow. “Being faced with the sudden possibility of fatherhood, it somehow didn’t seem as… daunting as it once was.”

He sighed and smiled bleakly, glancing at her. “I know you don’t feel you’d be a good mother, Sara, but I’ve thought for years that you make an excellent mother one day. That case we worked a few weeks back is a case in point. The Bainbridge case.”

“Really?” she asked in surprise, thinking back to the case he was referring to. A home invasion gone wrong, that had left a young wife and mother brutally raped and murdered and her husband brutally beaten. They had a six-month-old son, Oliver. A female officer had been briefly assigned to care for the baby until child services could arrive. The baby boy had been unsettled since the attack on his parents and the officer hadn’t been able to soothe the child. It had come almost as a relief for the officer when a call had come through and she’d handed the baby off to Sara, before making her escape.

For a moment Sara had remained standing there, with a wailing baby in her arms, before instinct took over as she gently rocked the wailing bundle back and forth, as Grissom looked on from the kitchen doorway. Within minutes, Oliver had ceased his high-pitched wailing, and by the time child services had arrived, he’d been slumbering in her arms.

“Yeah,” Grissom replied, with a smile, drawing Sara from her musings. “The Collins case, when you first came to Vegas is another one. I still remember the look on your face when I first assigned you to look after little Brenda. You weren’t keen on the idea but you came through, just like I knew you would.”

He chuckled, his eyes crinkling slightly. “You got payback when you made me think you really had left poor Brenda in the car. Catherine didn’t let me forget it for weeks after.”

A smile touched the edges of Sara’s mouth. The whole team had joined in on her teasing. The look on his face had been priceless. 

“What are you saying, Gil? That you want to start a family?” she asked after a few minutes of silently studying him.

He sighed, and then chuckled as he said in an amused tone, “I never imagined that I’d be lying in bed, discussing starting a family, aged almost fifty.” He glanced at her again, his expression and tone serious.

 “Would it surprise you, that I’m choosing life, Sara? A life with you and… if you're willing, perhaps a couple of kids. I'm not going to be a CSI forever... my knees won't take it. But there are other options... I could go back to teaching or into research or even consulting. And you wouldn't necessarily have to go back to the lab if you didn't want to. We could work together as consultants or even work on a project of our own.”

“A what if it takes awhile to conceive, or it never happens?” Sara wanted to know. “Our ages, can work against us.”

“We keep on trying, and if, after an agreed amount of time nothing happened, then we could adopt… if that’s what you wanted.”

“You’ve really given this some thought, haven’t you?” Sara sounded both surprised and shocked.

Grissom sighed again. “I have,” he admitted. “But age isn’t the only factor. If we agreed to do this, there’s a chance that any biological child I have, could inherit otosclerosis. They could either be born deaf or it could develop in later life. My mother lost her hearing to it when she was eight. Surgery wasn’t an option for her then. But with medical advances since then… I started to lose my hearing a few years ago… surgery isn’t always 100 percent successful, but I was lucky.”

He paused again, as his face became serious as he considered his next words.

“My mother has never let her hearing loss stop her from living her life, just as you aren’t your mother, Sara. If we were to decide to go through with this, its because you want to, and not just because its something  _I_  want. You don’t have to decide now. Take as much time as you need.”

Sara smiled and nodded her head as her hand brushed against his bearded cheek. He moved forwards slightly so his lips brushed lightly against hers. She pulled him closer, pulling him with her as she lay on her back, as the kiss grew heated, and the room filled with the pleasant moans and groans and sighs of their lovemaking.

One month after that evening, Grissom asked Sara to marry him. She said yes, and two weeks later they celebrated their nuptials at the same courthouse where Brass first discovered they were a couple.

**

_Late January 2007_

“Hey Sara! What’s up?”

Sara’s thoughts returned to the present as she glanced up to see a lab tech outside the break room waving hello. “Hey. Not much. Just relaxing.” With that, Sara lifted up her cup of now cold coffee.

The tech waved at her again and left for her shift, leaving Sara alone once more. But as she sat at the table and played with the plain gold wedding band around her finger, a smile formed. She knew she was not really alone.

Her smile widened, her gaze settling onto her expanding abdomen. She and Grissom decided to let nature take its course, and they had both been pleasantly surprised at how quickly she’d conceived. They discovered the happy news two weeks after they’d married.

Surprise had turned to stunned shock when it was discovered that they were expecting twins – both boys that they’d decided to name Isaac and William, and were due in a few months.

Sara rose to her feet and headed back to the sink to rinse out her cup.

When they’d informed Ecklie of their marriage and pregnancy, he’d taken it better than either of them had expected he would. Loathe to losing either of them, when Grissom had informed him of his plans to leave the lab, after the twins birth, Ecklie had proposed that Catherine become Sara’s immediate supervisor, and so allow them to continue to work together, in exchange for Grissom staying on a year after the twins were born.

After much discussion between them, Grissom had agreed, provided that he would be free to consult or attend seminars as they arose. Knowing it would be beneficial all around, Ecklie had agreed, and a compromise was reached.

A series of several kicks from her twin sons jolted her, but she knew there was a reason for the utero ruckus. Daddy was here.

Sara sensed Grissom’s presence even before he spoke. And because she did, her body’s response to his proximity passed on to the babies. They stirred, kicking several times before turning in their cramped world. His unexpected return was a welcome surprise.

“I just spoke to Catherine. Hunter finally confessed to the rape and murders of the Sullivan family. And apart from the interrogation, you handled the case well,” he said as he stepped further into the break room, his eyes, concerned and incredibly blue searched her face.

Since no one was in the break room and the hall was clear, Grissom reached up and tucked a stray stand of hair from her face. His fingers brushed against her skin lightly, and heat bloomed between them at the contact.

Grissom inhaled a breath. The urge to kiss her was overwhelming. The quicker he could take her home, where he can privately show her exactly how much he’d missed her the better.

His hand curled around hers, entwining his fingers with hers. The same need reflected in her eyes.

“Come on, I’ll take you home,” he said quietly, repeating words he’d once said under vastly different circumstances and for vastly different reasons. Now those same words are loaded with a meaning far more intimate.

With a slight nod, Sara gathered the roses and together, they left the break room, Grissom still holding her hand.

Going home with her husband had never sounded sweeter. 

 

 

 

 


End file.
